Continuing Resolutions (not the Congressional kind)

blog pix new year

Happy New Year, my single and not single friends. We’re almost through the holidays, a time that can be stressful for those without a partner.

Piled on top of singleness are the tiresome 2017 wrap-up news stories and the guides to making New Year’s resolutions that stick. I’m pretty sick of these.

Let’s talk about a different approach while indulging in baked macaroni and cheese with crunchy panko topping.

I never make New Year’s resolutions. However I do make resolutions on an ongoing basis throughout the year. Reflecting on my life and how to make it better is something I do whenever I’m feeling a surge of dissatisfaction with the status quo and an energy boost to do something about it. That might happen after a break-up.

Breakups, particularly, when you are angry, can be good for motivating you to do things. I always exercise more intently when I need to get my angries out.

I also make resolutions when I’m in a rut and need more and new people or activities in my life. I’ve lived through some lonely times and they inevitably drove me to sign up for classes or activities that would expand my social life.

I’m mulling over some next steps right now – but nothing I’m going to announce tomorrow on New Year’s Day. There are classes to think about, new meet-ups to attend, trips to plan, and solo field trips that might trigger a meet-cute.

In the meantime, I recall someone (Ralph Waldo Emerson? T.S. Eliot?) said it is the journey not the destination that counts.

I believe that philosophy and it supports a practice of ongoing resolutions. So, I raise a glass of champagne (or asti spumante, prosecco, or cava) to you, my readers: let’s be our best selves in 2018 and embrace resolutions whenever we need them. It’s a good way to keep hope.

Until next week, happy dating or not dating.



Seventeen Niche Dating Sites for 2017


For many of us, the search for romance is like looking for a needle in a haystack. In honor of the year 2017, let’s browse 17 quirky and/or niche, smaller dating sites that make romance more of a search for a needle IN a needle.

Enjoy soba noodles while you browse.

Fitness Singles

With over 2 million members, Fitness Singles touts itself as the world’s largest online dating community for sports and fitness enthusiasts. The sign-up process is easy and straightforward with a focus on fitness activities and a healthy lifestyle.

When filling out your profile, you’re asked to list your top three fitness categories and your skill level. You can list additional activities as well. I didn’t particularly care for the physical attributes section, which asks your weight and height as well as your body type, appearance, and best feature. You can pick “you decide” for the best feature and appearance categories but you have to answer the other questions. I decided to go for it and answer all the questions.

Loading your profile and browsing other profiles is free but you need to be a paying member to respond to or initiate messages. When an interesting man reached out to me yesterday morning, I decided to sign up for 6 months. Time will tell whether this guy or the site is worth it. It’s a big online dating weekend and I’m not sure how much credence to put into the decent amount of attention my profile received in the last 24 hours.


Wondering if anyone else’s cat has an expressive tail? You’ll get an answer and a possible soul mate if you visit Purrsonals, a dating and social networking site for cat lovers. The site advertises a 14-day free trial. I didn’t sign up because, hey, I’m a dog person.

Ugly Schmucks

“i’m ugly, you’re ugly, let’s go” may not be the best profile headline but it seems okay when browsing the Ugly Schmucks site.

The site describes itself as “geared towards people who may feel unattractive or uncomfortable in their own skin and is designed to help them succeed in meeting others who value genuine personality over outer appearance.”

Although Ugly Schmucks says its members want to be judged for “what’s on the inside,” most of them are not taking chances: the majority of profiles do not have photos. However, the guys who have profiles do not look any “uglier” to me than the ones on other sites. It’s all about self-perception.

Ugly Schmucks is free to browse but, like most sites, you have to pay to send and receive messages.

Naturist Passion

Feeling burdened by clothes? This may be the site for you. Naturist Passion (NP) implores you to “find true nudists for dating and friendship!!”

No need to worry about what outfits to wear in your profile photos since you won’t be wearing clothes.

Naturist Passion claims it is the “first, most-trusted and largest site for nudist/naturist friends in the world.”  NP describes its members as those who enjoy living naked, skinny dipping, and meeting others with this lifestyle.

According to NP, “Nudism is a fun, healthy, freeing and wholesome way for men and women to socialize and live without clothes. Naturism is a philosophy that values simplicity and increased harmony with nature.”

If any of this resonates with you, 2017 might be your year to date naked.

Your Cause or Mine

If you’d like to make 2017 a year of volunteering, consider Your Cause or Mine. This cause-related dating community brings together singles interested in local causes. Members are matched based on location and cause interests. Once matched, the site suggests volunteer and cause events the couple could attend together. You can also search for volunteer and cause-related events. I’d consider joining this site.

Sea Captain Date

You don’t have to be a sea captain to join Sea Captain Date. “Any lonely soul who simply yearns for the ocean breeze can sign up for a free account.” I love the ocean but I’m not impressed by the sample profiles I viewed on the site. Perhaps you might like the 23-year-old “AllHandsonDick” or the 74-year-old with ED who loves to spoon. Next!

Farmers Only

Do you prefer tractors to sports cars, rich soil to concrete, fresh fruits and veggies to take-out? If so, Farmers Only might be the way to go. It’s easy to become a standard free member in order to browse profiles, send flirts, and receive a notice that a member has flirted with you. Only premium, paid members can email other members. The selection in my area and age range is limited but there may be better prospects in your location.

Singles with Food Allergies

It could be nice to have a back-up epi pen in the house. Just saying.

Paleo Connect

Looking for a mate who lives a Paleo lifestyle? This free site might be for you.

Clown Dating

If you are a clown, a clown in training, or you just love clowns, smile and sign up. This one’s not for me. Sign me clown phobic.

Herpes Fish

Men and women with herpes may find this site helpful.

420 Singles

Dating for the cannabis community – via your computer or a phone app.

Date a Golfer

Find romance on the golf course or at least share your passion for golf.

Age Match

This is an age gap dating site: older men/younger women and older women/younger men.

My Lovely Parent

Reluctant older daters get dating encouragement via My Lovely Parent. The children or friends of the hesitant daters initiate the application process and the site sends the prospective member an invitation link to complete his or her profile.

Furry Mate

This site is for those who identify with furry creatures and want to meet other “furries.” If you have to ask what this is all about, this is probably not your site.

Equestrian Singles

If Black Beauty was your favorite book and/or you are a horse enthusiast, this site is for you.

Do any of these sites appeal to you? Let me know if you sign up!

Until next week, happy dating or not dating.