Annoyed Woman Leads Good Dating Behavior Movement

annoyed woman

Remember the line in Broadcast News when a news anchor yells, “I’m mad as hell and I’m not going to take it anymore?”

It’s time, ladies, to start “not taking” men’s bad online dating behavior anymore. During this activist time, let’s bond and call men out when they deserve it. And my male readers, I urge you to do the same for the women who exhibit bad manners.

Let’s do this with control and politeness – there’s enough ugly commenting happening online already. But let’s make our points. Our goal: To change the Tinderverse (and other dating worlds) one exchange at a time.

Yes, in fact this is my super power. Call me Annoyed Woman.

Annoyed Woman still likes to cook. Try this crispy tofu from the kitchn, a recipe inspired by my recent cooking class. Serve with a dipping sauce of your choice or incorporate into a stir-fry or pad Thai.

The last time I was on the receiving end of bad behavior, I wrote the following response. I didn’t send it and it’s too long but, next time I will pen an appropriate length communication and send it out to the offender. “This is how we can start to turn things around,” she said optimistically.

Dear Mr. Tinder, Match, OurTime, BUMBLE, OkCupid, Hinge,

Imagine for a minute that we met at a party and started chatting. We talked for an hour and a half exploring 19 different questions and issues. And let’s suppose that I made a comment and asked the 20th question of the evening…and then you just walked away. Not a polite- “Well, I think I’ll get a drink” or “I see someone I know, it’s been nice talking to you.”  Or “Sorry I’ve got to make a call but can I get your number?”

None of that, you just walked away.  Hard to imagine doing that in “real life,” isn’t it? You’d be a real jerk if you behaved that way.  

And here is the challenge and the problem with a virtual conversation. It’s still a conversation. You assume that because you’re not standing in front of someone, there’s no accountability or responsibility.  

But when you act like the other party doesn’t really exist, that she has no feelings, you dehumanize what could be a real connection. By not saying “Nice chatting with you. Take care,” you have ruined an opportunity for grace and either continuance or closure. And you are now primed to continue acting this way in other dating encounters, whether it’s breadcrumbing or ghosting or any of the myriad modern dating actions which are really new words for the same old bad behaviors.

What do you think (other than the length)? It starts with you ladies. Let’s do this.

As you know, I like to leave you with a laugh…so let’s enjoy some crazy messages and profiles (and one clever one) from my dating files:

pix1

I guess I’m a nice guy….Not sure how/why I got this message!

*************************************************************************************

pix2

No comment.

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pix3

A for creative

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pix4

Likely a fake profile but regardless this embedded “jornalist” needs to embed in a good proofreading book.

Until next week, happy dating or not dating.

XXXOOO

Nadia

4 thoughts on “Annoyed Woman Leads Good Dating Behavior Movement

  1. Love the examples. As a woman online dater, I am frequently guilty of ghosting others, it may be a generational thing. I used to signify the end of a conversation if I wasn’t feeling up to meeting, but even behind the safety of a screen that got people upset and reacting to the point of my discomfort and I found it easier to just abandon ship. Because I do it, I’ve learned not to take offense to others doing it, but it certainly is a strange norm to navigate.

    Liked by 1 person

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