An Advance Marketing Approach to Dating

blog pix July 9 cupid

You’ve gotten the emails or seen the commercials. Get ready for fall now… but it’s only June. Buy school supplies instead of a new bathing suit. You barely step into one season before the advertising barrage and decorations thrust you into the next one.

What if romantic pursuits took place in a similar fashion?

Suspend reality and let’s see what the world would be like if advance marketing took over the mating game. Have a real lunch of Federica’s Rigatoni with Tomato and Basil while we imagine.

You’ve just scored a promising online match with an attractive guy. Take charge and get ahead of the game! You know what’s coming. So don’t reply to his first message. Ghost him before he ghosts you. It’s all about being forward-looking.

You arrive at the bar for date/meeting #1 with Mr. Hot Stuff. Why wait for an end of date kiss? Seize the moment and pounce on him as he walks over to introduce himself.

It’s the end of date #2 with Mr. Hot Stuff (he apparently liked your exuberant first date greeting). As you discuss your plans for date #3, he asks, is there anything in particular you’d like to do?

Not one to be stuck in appreciating the thrill of the early stages of a romance, you suggest hiring a limo so you can travel in style to potential honeymoon venues by the beach. You tell him that great deals are to be had with advance planning. Surely, he’ll appreciate such a forward thinking and thrifty woman.

Somehow, despite your unusual behavior, you and Mr. Hot Stuff tie the knot. The wedding reception is still going strong, but why not pick your divorce lawyer now and lock in her hourly rate?  Twenty-five percent off if you don’t have kids.

It’s a good thing you locked in that rate. The divorce was tough but you have done the work, feel healed and ready to date again.

You signed up with a new dating app called ooOo and have a first meeting/coffee date scheduled with Mr. Cute Scientist. I need to up my advance game, you think. Several days before that first date, you visit your gynecologist for an STD screening test. Your plan: bring the (assumed) clean bill of health to Starbucks. As a biologist, he’ll appreciate my forward thinking about safe sex, you muse, and who wouldn’t love a woman with advance marketing skills?

Unfortunately, Mr. Cute Scientist is appalled by your tactics. Undaunted, you believe his reaction was an anomaly and feel confident that most men will appreciate your forward and forward thinking approach.

As you dress for date#1 with Mr. Tall Midwestern, you put on the elegant white I can wear this to my wedding suit you’ve had in your closet for months.

You realize that sometimes advance marketing has to be subliminal. So you rock the white suit with a low cut emerald green blouse but you don’t tell Mr. Tall Midwestern the outfit’s intended purpose.

Sometimes you have to temper an anti-mindfulness approach to dating with subtlety.

Until next week, happy dating or not dating.





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