My Bizarre Fantasy

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Nadia walks into a bar at dusk. It’s summertime and the living is easy. Margaritas are flowing…. happy hour time.

As she glances at the bar, Nadia notices that all but one seat in the middle section is filled. Men occupy the rest of the 15 stools. Not a single woman sits at the bar, though there are women and couples having dinner in the adjoining restaurant.

Nadia approaches the bar and asks the men sitting next to the empty seat if it’s taken. “No, please take a seat,” says one of them, a tall, dark haired man with striking blue eyes. His pale lemon yellow button-down shirt is open at the collar, sleeves pushed up to show his tanned and muscled forearm; his suit jacket is draped over the briefcase tucked next to his stool.

As she eases onto the stool, carefully crossing her high-heeled legs, Nadia copies the neighbor’s clothing storage solution and drapes her short-skirted scarlet red suit jacket over her briefcase. Her piggy pink V-neck blouse hints at her cleavage.

The bartender approaches Nadia. “We have a calamari special today,” he says giving her a friendly and approving smile. “Sounds great – and I’ll have a margarita on the rocks, no salt,” she says.

“Not a margarita purist?” asks her yellow-shirted neighbor. “No, I like it better without the salt,” she said giving him a big smile.

Then, she reaches down into her sepia briefcase and brings out a small, flat antique brass case, setting it down on her right side.

“Don’t tell me you’re going to take out a slim cigar from that case and smoke it in violation of the no-smoking rule,” says Mr. Yellow Shirt.

“This case doesn’t hold cigars,” Nadia says, smiling mysteriously.

Then she reaches once again into her briefcase and pulls out a large paperback book the size of a coloring book.


In fact, it is a coloring book.

Nadia sips on her margarita and opens the brass case. Inside, 24 fresh, beautiful, unused colored pencils, smile enticingly at her.

She slowly strokes the cover of One Year Wiser: The Coloring Book: Unwind with Weekly Illustrated Meditations and opens it with her carefully manicured nails. Each nail is a different Crayola color.

As Nadia starts to color the Peace is Always Beautiful (Walt Whitman) illustration, Mr. Yellow Shirt breaks out into a wild laugh. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone color at a bar before,” he says. “I’m Ben by the way. As an architect, I have to tell you I’m loving what you’re doing.”

Nadia smiles. “Would you like to color?” Ben finishes his sip of gin and tonic and says, “I’d love to.”

Nadia carefully tears out one of the illustrations and gives it to Ben and places the pencils between them. Her other neighbor, who has been watching the proceedings, asks if he can join the party.

In 20 minutes time, all of the men are coloring. No one is watching the baseball game on the muted television above the bar. No one is swiping on his phone. Every few minutes, one of the men shows Nadia his progress or asks about a color choice.

Nadia leans back, sips on her margarita, smiles and thinks to herself, “Now this is a good time. My very own almost 50 shades of grey, pink, blue,green….”

What’s your bizarre fantasy? Keep it only slightly naughty and send it to me.

Until next week, happy dating or not dating…and keep on coloring.

I was so excited I almost forgot our lunch!  In honor of Julia Child’s birthday today, while you’re thinking of your own fantasy, have some of Julia’s Bouillabaisse a la Marseillaise.



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